·        The new Comprehensive Reviewer of Father B. (no longer called ‘primer’) is good, very updated (until December 2005).  However, there are quite a number of typo errors and some repeated paragraphs that editors/proofreaders missed.

·        Super thank you, Allan/Faye/Kris, for the new books!!!  Super happy with my advanced birthday gifts! Owe you much!

·        Kris’ thanksgiving party was actually quite fun with april, allan, jing, and tina.  Our conversations were really funny (!) and full of insights.  Not bad for my sssstriiiiike three!

·        I made some rearrangements at home.  Kuya’s ‘blue room’ is now my intellectual sanctuary for the coming months, besides, it is breezier than my ‘airport room.’

·        April told me that some adversities in life are given for us to learn from them.  Repeated adversities may mean that the lessons therein may not have yet been learned.  Now, if only I can decipher what is it that I have to learn… I cannot afford to miss the elusive lesson anymore…

·        Incidentally, I got my 2005 bar exam grade — 74.25%; slightly lower than my 2004 bar, 74.80% [thank you, cousin jove, for following-up and accompanying me kanina]. But just the same, not even a whole point separating me from the successful person obtaining a 75%.  Why, oh, why?!  A friend says maybe my character is still being tested.  Another friend says maybe in my former life I had things easy and took so for granted; thus now, I am having harder time in life.  I heard many other outstanding theories; but none satisfactorily quelled nor answered my question.  My only consolation is, at least my grades affirm that I’m not that dumb to understand Philippine law!

·        In connection with bar grades, the office of the bar confidant said I cannot get my exam booklets in both years I failed (haynaku, I will never know kung hindi talaga sa akin yung mga booklets checked under my name or kung na-check-an nga talaga mga booklets ko).  Only those who passed can get theirs a year after they’ve taken their oaths.  So, 2004 batchmates, you can claim yours na.

·        Consequent to getting my grades and my recent life’s hardships, my mind has been spewing existential questions.  Goodness, now is not the time to be having them; but they just boggle my mind endlessly.  Sigh, my spirit and being kasi are so confused na rin of my place in God’s greater scheme of things. 

·        As I’ve mentioned before, I’ve done some decisions already.  But with my existential questions, I am now more afraid of their outcome; thus, I want additional affirmation and confirmation.  JM says it’s just me who can verify…I would know and feel that what I am doing is right and is for really for me.  To which I counter that something within me is silent and tired to ultimately determine the rightfulness of my decisions/plans.  Maybe because one vital source of my energy (needed to completely know the veracity of the decisions/paths i intend to take) has been snuffed and transformed into another form that I haven’t realized nor recognized yet.  Where and what is this energy now na ba…I want to know na!  It’s been so long already…